Anal sex.
I mean, I tried it once with Mr. Ghey (that's an entirely different post), and just by doing it the first time, years later it still has me leery.
*insert sad face here*
But I also know people that SWEAR by it and love it like no other. And then I know people who are like "giiirrrrrl don't do it bc I was constipated for two weeks." When I tried it, I was so nervous that it took him about 15 minutes to get it all the way in. Everyone says, "you just have to be REALLLY relaxed."
*stare*
I want someone to explain to me how the FUCK can u be relaxed when a dick is going in your ass? That's like pushing a hammer through a pinhole!
Even an associate in The Pink PussyCat was really trying to explain to me how the anus is "just a muscle that stretches..."
*blank stare*
I wish there was a way that can could get past the second time so that I could perhaps enjoy the third. The first time I did it, I stopped him about 8 or 9 strokes in. My ass ABHORRED me. I felt like my asshole was a never closing hole. I was walking around with an open ass. Omg.
I felt like I had to shit for a week and would just sit in the bathroom on the toilet for hours...for nothing! I was scared that as soon as I'd get dressed, my ass would start leaking! That wasn't the case but my god it sure felt like it. Eventually my ass closed up. Interestingly enough throughout the 9 strokes that I was able to take, the last..two...probably felt the best. So I have a taste of what the "goodness" feels like.
I DO want to do it.
But what FREAKS me is dudes who ALWAYS want me to take it in the butt.
*side eye*
Why are you ALWAYS tryna fuck me in my ass holmes??? Is there something that I should know about you? I mean ESPECIALLY if that's the first thing you're trying to get into over the pussy.
*blinkblink*
So what say you ladies? Is it overrated? Underrated? The shit? (No pun intended).
Talk to me.
You have to be on the bottom for anal sex. I mean people always be like do it from the back, side by side...NO. do it like regular missionary. Lots of KY jelly. that's the easiest way to do it. and at the same time, his pelvic will rub against your clitoris providing nice stimulation for you.
ReplyDeleteMy ass hurt reading this. I don't know HOW gay men do it (...oh wait, they have a prostate that makes it all worth it. Oops). But the shit SUCKS. I can ONLY really do it and enjoy it when I am good and pissy drunk(relax that muscle, baby!) and his penis is small. Hell, with a small dick all I CAN do is anal. Nothing else is satisfying, then lol.
ReplyDeleteBut, yes, anal had me feeling like I had to shit during and after the sex and then nothing came out. And you can tell when someone has had anal before because their booty hole is gapping. Yep, sure is...
And not to mention how self conscious I felt. I'm like, "is there SHIT on this guy's dick now??" Ha! No wonder men "boy douche"/ do an enema beforehand. Maybe that way they don't feel like they have to shit afterwards. Ha!
~*Pie*
LMAO @ Steph..thanks boo. Imma keep my KY in my bag.
ReplyDeletePie - you are too funny. I feel like Imma have to have SOOOO much Fight Juice (aka Henny - and I dont even DRINK that shit) Yea I was thinking a small duck would do but...eesh. I DONT WANT MY BOOTY HOLE TO BE GAPPING LMAOOOO.
shittin on the dick is a major concern of mine, im like ok maybe i wont eat but who KNOWS when that event will happen?! I can't lolol